JMJ

 

Yesterday was Holy Family Sunday, and the second reading was one of the most controversial in the Bible. So controversial, I suspect, as to explain the fact that a second, alternate reading was offered.

Wives, be subordinate to your husbands, as is proper in the Lord.

Husbands, love your wives, and avoid any bitterness toward them.

Children, obey your parents in everything, for this is pleasing to the Lord.

Fathers, do not provoke your children, so they may not become discouraged.

That sounds like endorsing male supremacy. It also seems to require children to submit to an abusive parent without recourse.

I disagree. This is framed as a contract or covenant, with responsibilities on both sides. Compare God’s covenants with Abraham, Noah, Moses, or mankind. If the Jews or mankind do not keep their side of the bargain, God is not bound by his side.

Compare again the Lockean social contract, expressed in the American Declaration of Independence. One is morally obliged to be subordinate to the government so long as the government is doing its proper job of protecting one’s rights to life, liberty, and property against criminals and outsiders. If government itself infringes on those rights, one has the right and even the duty to oppose the government.

If a husband does not show love to his wife, and acts in bitterness towards her, she is under no obligation to subordinate herself. If she will not subordinate herself, conversely, he is under no obligation to show love to her. If parents provoke their children, their children need not obey. If they will not obey, the parents may provoke.

Not incidentally, “so that they may not become discouraged” is an astute description of the result of abusive parenting. “Discouragement” is the essence of what we call “depression.”

The feminists will no doubt still object, since the suggested norm remains that the wife should subordinate herself to the husband.

But not to have a clear chain of command, in any social group, is a recipe for conflict and chaos. Someone must make the final decision. In deference to the fact that the man must provide for the family through his labour, it ought in justice to be him. Otherwise, he is a slave.